It's official. I am the mother of a teenager. She won't be 13 until next year but it's now more than obvious to me that she's no longer a little girl. While enjoying her Tita Sandy's birthday cupcakes earlier tonight, we were talking about school and she casually blurted out, "Mom, you know some of the girls in my group slash their wrists." I had just taken a bite of the cupcake and had to quickly grab my glass of Coke to down it with because I almost choked on the cake. WHAAAT??? 
Slash their wrists? She said it in the present tense. And what did she mean by "some of the girls in my group"? She said around 6 or 7 did it --- or still do on occasion. At first I thought it was just one girl and I surmised that this kid must have such a complicated home life for her to be driven to do something as drastic as attempt to end her life. But 6 or 7 of them??? It then dawned on me that this was some kind of trip. Maybe they dared each other to do it, I don't know. Anissa couldn't explain it to me either. All she said was that they would do it in school and a girl from the group (one of the smartest ones and an academic awardee of the class) decided to speak up and tell their adviser about it (needless to say, this girl has been banned from the group for being a "traitor"). I tried hard to conceal the panic I felt but I guess I wasn't successful. Soon, my girl was sobbing and begging me not to say anything to her Class Adviser or her Guidance Counselor. The girl is clearly under a lot of pressure to keep her mouth shut. Whether a warning was issued to her or not by someone in her group is beside the point. Fact is, she is scared out of her wits and doesn't want to have to explain to any of her groupmates why she squealed on them. Anissa declared that the adviser had already called the attention of these girls and this is why they decided to dismantle the group by re-sectioning the girls, Anissa included. I know my daughter would never resort to such a daredevil act. Anissa, although headstrong and always vocal about her feelings, isn't as brave as these other girls are. But that's just it...she's more of a follower than a leader (atleast in this group) so the possibility of being pressured to do something foolish and against her will is not entirely far-fetched.
Slash their wrists? She said it in the present tense. And what did she mean by "some of the girls in my group"? She said around 6 or 7 did it --- or still do on occasion. At first I thought it was just one girl and I surmised that this kid must have such a complicated home life for her to be driven to do something as drastic as attempt to end her life. But 6 or 7 of them??? It then dawned on me that this was some kind of trip. Maybe they dared each other to do it, I don't know. Anissa couldn't explain it to me either. All she said was that they would do it in school and a girl from the group (one of the smartest ones and an academic awardee of the class) decided to speak up and tell their adviser about it (needless to say, this girl has been banned from the group for being a "traitor"). I tried hard to conceal the panic I felt but I guess I wasn't successful. Soon, my girl was sobbing and begging me not to say anything to her Class Adviser or her Guidance Counselor. The girl is clearly under a lot of pressure to keep her mouth shut. Whether a warning was issued to her or not by someone in her group is beside the point. Fact is, she is scared out of her wits and doesn't want to have to explain to any of her groupmates why she squealed on them. Anissa declared that the adviser had already called the attention of these girls and this is why they decided to dismantle the group by re-sectioning the girls, Anissa included. I know my daughter would never resort to such a daredevil act. Anissa, although headstrong and always vocal about her feelings, isn't as brave as these other girls are. But that's just it...she's more of a follower than a leader (atleast in this group) so the possibility of being pressured to do something foolish and against her will is not entirely far-fetched.What truly pisses me off is the fact that I've been clueless about it all this time. I'm so thankful that Anissa is open with me and feels there's no need to keep things like this a secret. What if that weren't the case? Shouldn't the school have exerted some effort in reaching out to the parents about this issue? Maybe not ALL the parents, but just those whose girls are in this particular group. I have not heard from the adviser or any school official about this at all. It's possible that they've called the attention of the parents of the guilty parties but what about the rest of us whose girls are also part of the same group? Someone should have atleast raised the flag so that we can keep a more watchful eye on our daughters. A simple warning via a one-on-one would have sufficed, if they wanted to protect those involved.
I swear I am going to pull Anissa out of this school if I don't get a proper explanation from school officials as to why they are sitting comfortably on their asses about this. Am I over-reacting? I know I usually do but this time I'm confident I'm not. This is something no parent should take sitting down. It's not like these kids were caught doing the normal things would-be teenagers like to experiment in. Slashing their wrists??? Come on!
I've been asked by other parents whose kids go to the same school if I'm happy with the way the school is being run in general. I always say not entirely. There are many things they can do so much better to make our lives as parents much, much easier. But those previous concerns were all tolerable, not enough reason for me to seriously consider another institution to provide my daughter's education. There's no such thing as a perfect school but this one is just absolutely inexcusable.
I'm sure you all are dying to know what school I'm talking about. I won't rush into things by carelessly mentioning it here as I want to be able to talk to someone from there first. However, if I'm not happy with the way they handle my concerns, they can be absolutely sure I'll tell the world what a lousy excuse of a school they run.
Let's see what happens when I give them a call tomorrow.
No comments:
Post a Comment